Facebook makes my face frown

     There is nothing wrong with me. I know this to be true. And yet, I have been told by countless people who I know and love (as well as those I don’t know at all) that there is. My name is Bethany, and I am not on Facebook. For the record, I also do not belong to any internet social networks or post on message boards. I have been told that I am missing out on all kinds of fun and opportunities to connect, but am I? 

     I will admit that I begrudgingly have a MySpace account. However, I only have it to get a handle on what my niece and nephews are up to (and Dear Lord, I wish I didn’t know!) I have never updated it, formatted it, blogged on it, added pictures to it, uploaded a song to listen to while you view it, or asked people to be on my friend list. I think I have a total of six MySpace “friends,” one of which is Tom the helpful MySpace IT guy.  

     I guess I am from the old school. I like to actually talk to my friends face to face. I like to throw parties and invite my own social network to attend. I choose to email or call friends I haven’t heard from in a while. Sometimes, I even write letters! I still communicate with the friends that I want to stay in touch with from high school and college. And to be quite honest, I really have no desire to hear from a guy who had a crush on me in 8^thgrade or some vaguely familiar Alpha Delta Pi that I took Intro to Psychology with. I don’t need to validate myself by having hundreds of “friends” listed on a web page. I don’t need to connect with “moms just like me,” because my best friends ARE moms like me, and we make a point to get together whenever possible to drink wine and talk about parenting, marriage, hopes, dreams, and who should win on Rock of Love 2. (Go Ambre!)

     Don’t get me wrong, the internet is a great tool. E-mail is vital to my life. Instant messaging with my best friend from work all day is sometimes the only thing that gets me through the day. I am happy to use the web to look up information and locations, do some personal banking, play Bejeweled or read the news and reviews from around the globe. But friendship is personal, isn’t it? It is for me. So thank you, but no thanks. I will decline your invitations to join Facebook or to make me your friend on MySpace. I have a party with my friends to plan.